An Ode to JC’s Birthday
Paddling through the Yarra
In a holey old canoe
Hitting rocks below
Whilst fighting off a ‘roo
~~~~~
Tiger snake swims by
Hissing Christmas songs
It’s time for summer holidays
And I’m in my boardies n’ thongs
~~~~~
Oh! Jingle bells, my red bin smells
It wasn’t picked up last week
It’s Christmas time in Warrandyte
40 degrees and my goon-bag’s sprung a leak, hey
~~~~~
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Christmas time is grouse
Oh what fun it is to ride
‘cross the bridge to Nanna’s house
~~~~~
Asphalt’s getting hot
Melts the soles of shoes
An echidna’s getting prickly
He deserves a chilled beer too
~~~~~
All the clan is there
Sitting by the river
Christmas Day the Wazza way
Even Wombats are ruining their liver.
~~~~~
Oh! Jingle bells, my compost smells
The outdoor table is set
It’s Christmas in Warrandyte
And the rain’s on its way I bet, hey
~~~~~
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Kookaburras stole the goose
A dozen ales and a few chilled wines
And Granny’s getting loose
~~~~~
Come the afternoon
The adults have a doze
The prawn heads start going off
And burn the hairs of my nose
~~~~~
The snoring has slowed down
It’s finally time to go
Except Auntie Pain-in-the-arse
Decides we need the annual photo
~~~~~
Oh! Jingle bells, recycling bin smells
The kids have spat the dummy
It’s Christmas in Warrandyte
The ham’s given us an upset tummy, hey
~~~~~
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Christmas time is ace
Oh what fun it is to stagger home
Completely off your face.
~~~~~
Internet’s back on-line
And the bridge is working fine
Despite Santa losing his sleigh
On the round about
~~~~~
It’s the Warrandyte community way
To help the poor fella out
Use my old tin bath for his sleigh
And wrangle a flock of cockies for the flight
~~~~~
Oh! Jingle bells, my septic tank smells
I should have connected the sewer
It’s Christmas night in the ‘Dyte
Where the sunset’s a ripper sight, hey
~~~~~
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Christmas time is worth the fuss
Oh what fun it is to ride
On an uncrowded 906 bus
Paddling through the Yarra
In a holey old canoe
Hitting rocks below
Whilst fighting off a ‘roo
~~~~~
Tiger snake swims by
Hissing Christmas songs
It’s time for summer holidays
And I’m in my boardies n’ thongs
~~~~~
Oh! Jingle bells, my red bin smells
It wasn’t picked up last week
It’s Christmas time in Warrandyte
40 degrees and my goon-bag’s sprung a leak, hey
~~~~~
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Christmas time is grouse
Oh what fun it is to ride
‘cross the bridge to Nanna’s house
~~~~~
Asphalt’s getting hot
Melts the soles of shoes
An echidna’s getting prickly
He deserves a chilled beer too
~~~~~
All the clan is there
Sitting by the river
Christmas Day the Wazza way
Even Wombats are ruining their liver.
~~~~~
Oh! Jingle bells, my compost smells
The outdoor table is set
It’s Christmas in Warrandyte
And the rain’s on its way I bet, hey
~~~~~
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Kookaburras stole the goose
A dozen ales and a few chilled wines
And Granny’s getting loose
~~~~~
Come the afternoon
The adults have a doze
The prawn heads start going off
And burn the hairs of my nose
~~~~~
The snoring has slowed down
It’s finally time to go
Except Auntie Pain-in-the-arse
Decides we need the annual photo
~~~~~
Oh! Jingle bells, recycling bin smells
The kids have spat the dummy
It’s Christmas in Warrandyte
The ham’s given us an upset tummy, hey
~~~~~
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Christmas time is ace
Oh what fun it is to stagger home
Completely off your face.
~~~~~
Internet’s back on-line
And the bridge is working fine
Despite Santa losing his sleigh
On the round about
~~~~~
It’s the Warrandyte community way
To help the poor fella out
Use my old tin bath for his sleigh
And wrangle a flock of cockies for the flight
~~~~~
Oh! Jingle bells, my septic tank smells
I should have connected the sewer
It’s Christmas night in the ‘Dyte
Where the sunset’s a ripper sight, hey
~~~~~
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Christmas time is worth the fuss
Oh what fun it is to ride
On an uncrowded 906 bus
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